Tory: Age thirty-three and newly married, Tory had an unusually hectic schedule when she became ill with liver disease. She often worked late, volunteered at a nursing home, played league basketball, attended her husband's amateur comedy group and sustained a very active social life.
Tory found it difficult to slow down and set priorities after she became ill. The waiting period before transplant was frustrating because she could do so few of the things that she enjoyed. She always felt that she should be able to get more accomplished than she did.
When illness or other circumstances force you to rank your interests or activities, watch out for the word 'should' in your thinking. It is too easy to identify with other's expectations for yourself. This may be a costly error when you have only a limited amount of energy. Your health can suffer.
For example, you may believe that you should always have dinner ready when your family gets home. Tory felt that she should stay overtime at work to be certain that she was always ahead in her work. When you notice yourself saying I really should do this or that, see if you can replace the phrase I should with I want or I need. Do I really want or need to do this? Is it really necessary or important? And who exactly is it important for, me or someone else? When time or energy is scarce, these can be useful questions to help you decide your priorities.