Before I became ill, I felt as though I had some control over my life. Now it is as if illness and doctors have taken over. Is there nothing that I can do?
This question strikes at the heart of how illness can frustrate and demoralize people. Illness chips away at your personal sense of mastery. It disrupts your plans and frustrates your goals. It can tire you, slow you down, distract your mind. It can make you feel or look differently than you wish. When ill, a great challenge is to retain a sense of control. Otherwise, dignity is eroded. A sense of resignation takes hold.
In response to your question, there is a lot that you can do. Each chapter in Surviving Transplantation aims to enhance your ability to live life fully in the face of illness. The approach that we encourage is simple. Many events occur in your life each day. You have influence over some. Others you do not. Your first job is to realize this truth. Your second job is to learn which is which.
What do you have the potential to influence? What do you not at this time? When you see some potential for control, seize the opportunity. For those events over which you have little or no control, you may find someone else who can help. This of course, is how you came to consider transplantation. Your hope is that the transplant team can help you to do something that you cannot do alone. You hope that they will help you to regain your physical health.
But these comments only begin to address your question. Next, you must look at how you have directed your efforts at control. Many people work very hard to influence their lives and health. Yet, many also ignore much of their potential to do so. This is why we have tried to broaden your view of health. You may not have full control over all aspects of your physical health. But you have great potential to influence your approach to illness, your response, and the meaning that illness holds in your life.
Too many people assume that control means they should not have to adjust their own lifestyle. To them, control implies that they have to either change their circumstances or resign themselves to fate. This is mistaken thinking. It severely limits your options for influence. Even if you could directly change nothing about your physical health, there are always adjustments in your self that can positively affect your health. By addressing these and many other personal issues, you allow a greater opportunity to directly enhance your health. Further, a healthy state of mind is likely the best nourishment that you can give your body in its efforts to combat illness.