Work
Work does not only mean paid employment. It can also refer to a volunteer job, going to school, community work, caring for others, or maintaining your home. Anything that involves productive activity is a type of work.
For many people, work is a core and defining aspect of their life. It is the most common source of financial support. It can be a major source of satisfaction and accomplishment. Many social interactions are an extension of the work that one does. Work is so central to our personal identity that we often define ourselves in terms of the work that we do. We usually don't say, I work as a teacher or I work as a homemaker. We are more likely to say, I am a teacher or I am a homemaker. You may ask a child, What do you want to be when you grow up?" But the question that you are usually asking is "What type of work do you want to do?" Work almost defines who we are as a person. It is a statement of who we are instead of just something that we do.
Should serious illness limit your ability to work, it is not just your work that is threatened. It may be your income, your self-esteem, your social life, your personal identity. It is not likely to surprise you that we suggest that diminished work capacity can be a most disturbing effect of illness. Many transplant candidates, when asked why they wish a transplant, will reply that it is their only hope to return to their work and career.
Robert: Robert had been on his own since a teenager. His father had died when he was ten years old. By the time he was 14, Robert was working in construction to help support his mother and younger brother. As he grew older, he took pride in his labor and enjoyed his position as the provider for his family. As an adult, Robert was proud that he could support his own family with the income from the Construction Company he now owned.
He couldn't believe it when his doctor told him that he had a serious heart condition. Robert knew that he had chest pain at times. But he had assumed it was indigestion. Now the doctor was suggesting that he would have to work less. Medications could treat his condition for now, but it was possible that he would need a heart transplant some time in the future. Robert asked if he could have the transplant now. He couldn't imagine what it would be like to work less. "What will I do with myself? What will others think of me? Am I supposed to just lie around the house all day long?"
The doctor had said only that he might need a transplant in the future. Meanwhile, she offered to work with Robert to maintain his health. But he left the office feeling horrible, lost, and angry. It could not be true. He would find another doctor to give another opinion.
The threat to Robert's security and identity is obvious. What could be a greater insult to his expectations for his life? But it is remarkable that after a period of shock and despair, many people like Robert will adapt to their new reality. They shift priorities, rework budgets, make new plans, find new interests. Hopefully this shift will be on a temporary basis. But sometimes it is not. This ability to adapt to new situations is central to the strength that helps people through tragedy.
One of the shifts that may be helpful is to consider the idea of defining work more broadly. Few would argue that it is ideal that you are paid well for work that you do. But when full time employment is not feasible, remember our earlier definitions that work refers to any productive activity. Many people whose health limits their work will turn to volunteer or community work. Some transplant recipients offer their time to counsel new applicants or candidates, or speak on behalf of transplant groups. One woman we met was unable to work steadily enough to return to paid employment. She supported herself with a disability pension but volunteered her time to several charity organizations. The amount of time that he had to spend on dialysis treatment demoralized another man we knew. One day a nurse mentioned to him that she thought that dialysis was just part of the work that he must do to sustain a productive life. Something about this perspective helped this man pursue his dialysis with renewed interest and diligence.
We all need to be productive. The social and personal rewards are not entirely dependent upon financial gain. And they may be available through a variety of productive activities that you may not have previously considered.